A lesson in tolerance and self-respect

Also included at the Breaking The Cycle gathering were names of young people tragically killed.

The international Breaking the Cycle assemblies began in 1999 following the Columbine High School shootings in the USA.

They aim to: counteract youth violence by addressing bullying, peer pressure and racism; teach conflict resolution skills that promote self-respect and respect for others; build links between educators, parents, students and law enforcement.

And their message works on the simple premise that 'kids love stories.'

Giving direct, 'positive' and 'inclusive' messages, appealing to young people to value their own lives and those of others, guest speakers, who attend the assemblies, bravely tell their own personal life-experience stories, describing how conflict resolution, 'stems from the act of forgiving.''

Attending the first of two assemblies held at the school on Friday, were town Mayor Cllr Patrick Douart, PC Sarah Ellis, representing Sussex Police, with guest speakers John W. Franshaw and Nathan Levy.

John and Nathan told how they had suffered the loss of a beloved family member, describing their heartbreaking stories to the hundreds of students in the hushed assembly hall. John was to describe how his father, Delf, returning home with a pick-up load of firewood, ran over and killed John's 20-month old brother Nicholas; tragically, Delf had not seen him until it was too late.

Delf found it difficult to forgive himself and the accident was to haunt him for years.

His wife Katie was to say: "There was never any question about forgiving my husband, as I knew I was just as much to blame. Likewise he did not blame me, only himself. We stood in our sorrow together."

Moving to Paraguay Delf became a teacher and was finally able to assuage his guilt by making time for children.

Addressing the school John emphasised the importance of talking over worries or concerns with someone and said: "We all have problems, challenges and worries and it's important to find someone to talk to about these things."

Nathan told in vivid detail the day his brother Robert, a talented grade A student, died on September 16, 2004, after suffering fatal stab wounds.

He said: "My message is of forgiveness."

He added: "I am here to tell you what happened with Robert destroyed my family, but talking to you guys offers inspiration to me."

He also brought an important message: "Take school as importantly as you can, think about other people, forgive each other for silly little things, be caring and kind, show respect, look out and protect each other."

After the assembly Cllr Douart said: "It was very moving to hear those true stories and for them to be told in such a way that young people feel and understand what the speakers went through - it is extremely beneficial to the important messages that these assemblies wish to impart."

The hard-hitting true stories clearly had a profound impact on many of the students.

Two students moved by the speaker's experiences were Year 10 students Jackson Tigwell, and Amber Siviter.

Jackson, 14, said: "It was great; it all really got through to me. It was so brilliant - it goes straight to your heart, and I really feel for the people that this has happened to."

Amber, 15, admitted that normally it takes a lot for her to be moved, but of that day's experiences she said: "My heart went out to Nathan, and coming to this assembly was a really great experience."

On leaving the assembly each student was presented with their own copy of the book, 'Why Forgive?' by Johann Christoph Arnold, which contains a foreword by John W. Franshaw.

Bexhill High's organiser of this series of assemblies, Jennifer Lake said she believes the assemblies to be extremely beneficial to the young people of today.

For further information on Breaking the Cycle visit the web-site at: www.breakingthecycle.co.uk