WHAT GOES 99 PLONK?: That old playground joke [answer, a centipede with a wooden leg] applies to me right now, as I have a wonky hip [like a good many others of pensionable age] I didn’t want anyone to know, but finally, I dropped a pack of cheese on my foot in Tesco, and couldn’t pick it up! I’m a bit of a control freak really, I like to run my own home, and be able to look after people myself. Suddenly though, my husband has stepped up to the podium, and is a cross between Dr Kildare, and ‘Sue Barton Neighbourhood nurse’. If I stand up, he asks me to sit down, if I move, I have to report where I’m going [There’s a touch of the ‘halt, who goes there about it’!] but sometimes we all need to give in and seek help, and I realise that world doesn’t stop if I’m not wandering around with a tin of Pledge. Everyone is so kind [there are lovely folk in Iden]. My neighbours, Tom and Pat have made wonderful food, and I’ve had cards and flowers [all for just one hip] Thank you one and all. I’m very grateful. As soon as I’m running around again, I hope I can reciprocate.

TICKETS ARE NOW ON SALE: Pantomime tickets are on sale in Iden Stores, for the ‘Iden Players’ pantomime ‘Cinderella’ .Rehearsals are well under way, for what promises to be a great Panto! Proceeds from the pantomime go to St. Michael’s Hospice, and to the village hall, towards new washroom facilities. There will be a raffle during the intermission, and donations towards the raffle would be very much appreciated. Please ring Teresa Parsons if you can supply a raffle prize [telephone 01-797 280143]

WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE POINT: Have you had them calling? An entourage of folk called at my door the other day dressed in velvet plumage, trying to squash a glass slipper on my foot [they were barking up the wrong tree, because with my hip, I’m hard pushed to put on anything that doesn’t do up with Velcro!] I hope they find Cinderella soon, because the poor old prince looked as though he was heading for a breakdown!

JUMBLE SALE TOMORROW: Tomorrow, at 1pm, in Iden village hall, there will be a jumble sale in aid of new washroom facilities in the hall. Jumble can be brought to the hall until 10.30 am. Do come along for mammoth bargains!

THE POP-IN: The next Pop-In will be on Monday 7th March, at 11am, in Iden village hall. Everyone is

Welcome for coffee/tea, biscuits and a nice get-together.

BINGO: The next Bingo session will be in Iden village hall, on Thursday31st March. Doors open at 2pm, eyes down at 2.30pm. Everyone is welcome from the Rye area. The is a jackpot, a flier, a raffle, and a light tea at half time It’s good fun!

A SERVICE OF HOLY COMMUNION: There will be a service of Holy Communion, in Iden Parish Church, at 9.30am, on Sunday.

HOW WE RECORD OUR WEATHER: This is the title of the talk given at the Iden and District Natural History Society, on Friday 11th March, at 7.30pm, in Iden village hall. The talk, given by David Powell should be very interesting, in view of the somewhat erratic weather we have had recently. Everyone is most welcome. Visitors pay £3.

ANYTHING TO DECLARE!: With the possibility of going into hospital, I sent for four nighties from a catalogue, and when they came, they looked like something Red Riding Hood’s Grandmother wore before she was eaten by the wolf. Oh well, at least I have a very nice sponge bag! I want to be a respectable patient, so I’ve splashed out on all kinds of toiletries [it’s a wonder there is anything left in ‘Boots’!] Cotton buds, four flannels, tissues, baby wipes, spray perfumes, eye make-up remover pads, antibacterial wipes, day cream, night cream, Vaseline, hand cream, baby lotion, bed socks. What it’s all for? , I don’t know. It’s almost like passing an audition to be a patient. [show us your sponge bag lady, or you’re out of here!]

CONTACT ME: If anyone has anything to add to the Village Voice, please ring Gill Griffin [telephone 01-797 280311]

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