Bye, ciao, au revior, auf wiedersehen to the Euro

Welcome the new (Dutch) king!
As a strong Euro believer I thought I would never say this; but as the crisis has finally hit the West-European countries big time, more Germans, Dutch and others want the Euro to go.

They no longer can afford to bail-out countries like Greece, Cyprus, and Portugal, Spain or sunny paradises.

Most groups of the West-European society believe that leaving the Euro is the quickest solution. They need every cent to survive themselves, in bad times we become selfish.

The grand public and the business-world do not want to pay for the greed that ruled the southern countries in the last 3 decades. Experts now agree with me that we are facing 5-10 years of non-growth and have to do with a modest consolidation.

Let me give you the latest work-floor details; the growth in Germany has slowed down as everybody including five-year old babies has a new car; the Germans want to keep the rest of their savings for bad times to come.

Amazingly personal wealth in Germany is a lot lower than in other countries. The Germans have started an Anti-Euro party which is doing quite well, so you understand why Angela is reluctant to give any more cash to Cyprus as elections are coming up.

Holland (yearly deficit 3 billion) had to increase austerity measures massively; taxes up, even for pensioners and sky-high prices for food, petrol and energy.

Wages are dropping and every day 1000 people lose their jobs. Food banks are overcrowded.

On the other hand the Dutch still have 350 Billion savings in the bank so the PM, Fred Rutten, came up with a hideous idea; his labour-liberal coalition made a social agreement with all parties and unions and promised the Dutch that they will put all austerity measures on hold for 6 months. In return he asked the Dutch savers to spend all 350 billion pocket money on cars, houses, washing machines, tellys and caravans. He hopes to kick-start the economy and believes that the extra income will make certain cuts not avoidable.

Sounds like a joke but it is true; it is like giving kids an extra fiver pocket money and tell them to go and spend it immediately on a new saddle for their bike. However, if the money spending does not take off, the heavy austerity measures will hit the low landers later this year after all. What would you do? Off course, like the Dutch keep your cash under the matrass for the days when the sh…… really hits the fan.

France is literally bankrupt, Mr. Hollande just tries to pluck the mega-rich and they all flee to London. Especially now Luxemburg is opening their black secret bank books; 1 French minister had to resign and Bayern Munich boss Ulli Hoeness had to report himself to the taxman. He still had enough cash left to keep his golden seat in the Allianz stadium and looking at his belly he still spends plenty of dough on food.

I had the pleasure to talk to an Italian journalist and she taught me that Italians give a toss about their state; they try to keep the money in the family and friends and do the deals around a bowl of carbonara and the bankers are not invited.

So pretty soon we might be back to a kind of Deutschmark adapted by Holland and Belgium. Luxemburg had plenty of assets to survive but now the billionaires are withdrawing their black money this might change.

The South of Europe will go back their old currencies and will be able to offer us affordable holidays again.

Oh, I forgot our new king; on April the 30th Prince Willem-Alexander will take over from his mum Beatrix and his lovely Argentine spouse, Maxima, will get title of Queen. Holland is already completely orange, t-shirts, caps, bikes, cows, drinks, trains, busses, cauliflowers, everything is orange and even the hookers behind the Amsterdam windows offer orange condoms.

Last but not least, I had to spend some time in a Dutch hospital for intense check-ups; it looks like a 5-star hotel, very modern and well organised. However the Dutch specialists said that the NHS has the best medical reputation in Europe. So I leave you on a high and start painting my bike orange.

You can read more about me on